Leadership Happens 9.4.09

Two days ago we discussed the different between a thermostat-leader and a thermometer-leader. Who knew that just 48 hours later I would have such significant examples of each?

EXPERIENCING A THERMOSTAT-LEADER:
Two days ago I made an off-the-cuff call to a significant influencer in the City of Flint Michigan that I had not met, but knew about. The call was somewhat on a whim and I was just going to investigate an idea I had. It turned out that this person was busy and we made quick arrangements for me to call back in a few hours when things were not so busy. Well, as the day wore on I forgot to call back and before I knew it the work day was over.

This afternoon, as I was getting ready to run some errands, I quickly checked my email before I left the house and to my surprise, there was an email from this person. Now, mind you, I did not give him my email address and we have never met face to face that I can recall (although we are connected through Face Book and our love and support for Flint Michigan).

He had sent me an email to follow-up on whatever I was calling about. Think about that! A man I have never met, who I called briefly out of the blue in the middle of a very busy day, remembered my name, got a hold of my email address and followed-up with me unexpectedly less than 48 hours later. I did not even tell him why I was calling. I bet this guy could sell ice to Eskimos! With leadership being influence, guess how he led me this afternoon! I shot off a quick email in response, briefly describing my question for him and thanking him for the impressive follow-through.

When I returned from my errands, guess what? That's right, he had responded to my email with a commitment to give some thought to my question over the holiday weekend and we would connect on the issue on Tuesday morning. This man impressed me so, that he made my day and gave me increased hope for a dilemma I am trying to solve. His thermostat-leadership helped me to change my attitude and outlook on my day and on an issue. Now that is a great example of how to lead and influence.

EXPERIENCING A THERMOMETER-LEADER:
Remember those errands I mentioned above? Well, while running one of them, I was in the close vicinity of a mother and her approximately 3-year old daughter. They were involved in some animated negotiations over a cereal box the little girl had taken off a shelf. The mother ended the negotiations by forcibly removing the box from the daughters hand and telling her, "You cannot have it and you need to SHUT UP about it." Both mother and daughter were in a heightened emotional state, which I assume the daughter started and the mother reflected... being a good thermometer-leader.

I finished my shopping and checked out. As I exited the store, I found myself walking behind the same mother and daughter. The mother made some calm unheard comment to the daughter which apparently the daughter did not want to hear. The daughter responded in an escalated manner, "SHUT UP MOMMY!” In reactive response, the mother immediately escalated to match her daughter's manner and declared to the daughter, "YOU NEVER TELL MOMMY TO SHUT-UP!" (Have I mentioned the power of role modeling in leadership?) As I passed by, I knew this was headed in the wrong direction. As we all exited the store, I could hear the confrontation continuing as the daughter escalated and the mother followed suit, reflecting and mirroring (as a thermometer does) the emotional environment her daughter was creating. One might ponder who the true leader in this situation was.

Point being, we have opportunities to lead and influence situations every moment of every day. How did you/I do today? We were leaders today! The question is what kind and how can we be better ones in our next interaction?

How Are You Leading?

As stated earlier, leadership is influence. So, if this is true, one of the questions needing answered is… How? How are you leading or influencing others? This basically is the "glass half full / half empty" dilemma. How does your influence affect others?

You can think of yourself and your attitude as a thermometer or a thermostat. What does a thermometer do? It reflects the temperature of its environment. A thermometer-leader becomes chaotic when he/she enters a chaotic situation or becomes calm when they enter a calm situation.

What does a thermostat do? It changes the temperature of its environment. A thermometer-leader changes the environment that he or she is existing in.

Because leadership is influence, both types (a leader that reflects or becomes their environment or a leader that changes their environment) have a dramatic effect on the outcome of any situation. As a parent, if you enter into the chaos and anger of your children embattled in sibling rivalry and you mirror that chaos and anger, you not only are not having a positive effect on the situation, but you are just adding gas to the engine that will drive the situation in the wrong direction at that moment and in the future.

As a true leader who wants to see progress and wants to move things forward, one must be a thermostat-leader. The type of leader that has a positive influence on the direction of the environment they are influencing. Whether the environment is at home, work, social, or private (yes, you can be a leader of yourself, all by yourself. Actually, what you do in private says more about your leadership abilities than what you do in public).

So ask yourself, "How do I lead and influence others?" Be honest with yourself than sit down and make a list. Entitle it, "How I can be a better thermostat!" And develop yourself a behavior and attitude plan on how to “set” yourself so you influence your environment for the better.